Out Of Words

It's over.

I have just sent the grammar checked fourth draft after it got its final polish in to the Almighty Lups, and might I say, it's a lot of words. And pages. Ugh.

Luckily for me, I don't have to memorize them, especially after learning oh so many songs for a musical like Seussical ! You poor, poor guys and gals have to. Oh my. And you're going to have a lot of new stuff to learn, new stuff that has proper spelling and comma use to boot.

I do not know when you'll be getting your hands on the scripts, that's mostly whenever there's enough free time by a Xerox machine for Lup. However, I think you'll find a smoother, sharper...hell, just an overall better play in your hands when it does get there. I hope you'll enjoy, cause the last thing I'd want is to write a show for a group of people who hate performing it. So just don't tell me you hate it.

ps Mickey Rourke got screwed

Draft IV: By The Numbers

Well, as per usual, I crunched the numbers and got some interesting results (at least for me, who is clearly trying to push Sabermetrics into play writing). Here are a few little points:

- The play ballooned up by 4 3/8s pages, including a page jump in the Alison/Toby seduction scene to include the other girls and a page jump in the scene with Alison and Sarah that leads Alison to seek Beth's assistance.

- Biggest trim came in the Dean Anderson/Major scene, losing 6/8ths of a page.

- There was a net gain of 30 new lines with this draft. This makes for 59 new dialogue parts in the past two drafts. So much for scaling down....

- If your character figures large in Alison's story when Will's not around, you probably got more lines (Sarah was the biggest gainer with 9 more lines than last draft). Alison also has the most lines, beating Will by 3. Finally.

- I barely touched a few scenes, specifically Eric/Will with the cat monologue, the Yeah Dudes scene (just omitted Gavin), and Will/Vicky's scenes all went mostly unchanged.

And, finally, as a treat to you, here is the new Alison/Will scene when they talk in the hallway. Well, if you can read my handwriting, that is.



Looks like something you'd find on DeviantArt or something. For the record, nothing below the opening description stayed until Will's "it's not that easy" on your page 33.

Fin.

24208 words
3038 paragraphs
8 months in the making
8.5 hours tonight alone
1 pretty much finished play

I had a whole long post here, but it didn't publish, and I'm about to pass out while trying to walk to my bed. I finished the almost-final draft at 6:41 am. It was totally worth it.

I now send it to the Lups (both plan and She- varieties), they'll give it a gander, check for grammar, spelling, and lots and lots and LOTS of new stuff. Different Alison/Will scenes for every one of their one-on-ones, streamlined ending, a joke I might have to cut, but screw it, it was funny when I thought of it.

"That's all well and good," you say, "but we're acting in it, so when do we get it?" I'm hoping there's a week turn around (it was a week to make this fourth draft, hopefully a week to polish it), which would place this script in your hands for your reSeussal next Monday, the 23rd.

I'm going through the stats tomorrow, I'll post anything interesting. The bottom line is a new 4 pages. That's...somewhat expected? We'll see what happens with that. I think it might actually streamline this whole show better. But that's for another day.

Now? I coma. Sweet, glorious victory coma.

A Sign Of Good Faith

We can rebuild her. We have the technology.

Final draft in your hands definitely before the end of the month.

If Will Were Tyler Durden

The word processor I use to write up Disorientation--or any screenwriting, for that matter--is called Front Page, and one of the best part are all the little toys and gadgets that come with it. For example, did you know that there are 23,368 words in the play, accounting for 2929 paragraphs? I didn't, and now I want to vomit.

Anyway, another cool feature allows me to isolate one person and get all of their lines. This gives me a great idea for the entire flow and tone of a character. For this draft, that character specifically is Alison. I never realized how many straight-up angry bitch comments she makes (clearly), but it's enough to choke a feminist, that's for sure.

It also allows me to hear her rant with no one else there. Enjoy as Alison talks to Will in the hallway, and do it for the last time, as a good portion of these lines will not be in the final draft.

Scene: INT. DORM HALLWAY - LATE NIGHT/EARLY MORNING P.29-35

ALISON: What are you trying to do?

ALISON: Is that the sweet spot?

ALISON: Nothing to say, it seems.

ALISON: It’s not the Inquisition.

ALISON: At least no one converted you.

ALISON: (looks at Will)
Nah, I was thinking of something from earlier.

ALISON: No, I wasn’t laughing at you this time. Wasn’t exactly laughing with you, either.

ALISON: Well if anyone fell I’d laugh. It’s a knee-jerk reaction.

ALISON: (looking at Will)
Sorta. (looks at audience) That’s much more rewarding, though.

ALISON: I kind of wish you were my only problem. It wouldn’t be as bad as say (directs toward her door) SOMEONE WHO WON’T GET OFF THE PHONE AT 3 IN THE MORNING!

ALISON: (looking at Will)
Pfft, one. You’ve been born with a unique advantage over more than half the world. Congratulations.

ALISON: Don’t worry, I’m sure this is just a temporary stopover before you get a better job than a more qualified person who just so happens to have breasts.

ALISON: --Are what? Too smart for you? Threaten your manhood? Know better than you?

ALISON: Some?

ALISON: (looks at Will)
--No, they’re fine. Divorced, but fine, separately, I guess....

ALISON: The term “mankind” alone is offensive. What about Womankind? When we try to describe our own species we are second-class. But if you’re a man--

ALISON: What isn’t?

ALISON: (heavy sarcasm)
I pity you.

ALISON: So you came to an all-girls school for what, a self-esteem boost? Of all the selfish--

ALISON: (quickly)
Parents do a lot of things. (regaining focus) So what, daddy tossed you into a barrel of women thinking we were easy pickings?

ALISON: Good.

ALISON: Now you know how every girl has felt since thirteen. (perky) Hey, maybe you do belong here.

ALISON: Bedtime.

Winging Over To London To Jam With The Stones!

As you requested, here are three films for the overall tone of the piece, as well as some things to look at for character (the example for Katy and Becca is, of course, the almighty Spicoli).

Note: Some of these movies are rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America, and as such, should not be viewed without parental consent if you happen to be under the age of 17. This way your parents can't get mad at me.

Fast Times At Ridgemont High (1982) imdb - Blockbuster - Netflix

Can't Hardly Wait (1998) imdb - Blockbuster - Netflix

10 Things I Hate About You (1999) imdb - Blockbuster - Netflix

A Face To Faces Set

I'll be seeing you lovely Disorientationers this Saturday from 12 to 12:30 in the afternoon. Oh we will laugh and cry and probably tear about the script. Like it should be. So much work. Dammit.

If you haven't yet, please check out this simple, anonymous, 7 question survey regarding some very basics about the play itself here. Some interesting and useful responses so far, so thanks to everyone who has already kicked in a few words into a text box and hit "next."

See you all on Saturdeeee....